Australia Day - January 26

There is a stereotypical way to spend Australia Day:

1. Go to the beach.
2. Listen to “Home Among the Gum Trees” by country music legend John Williamson.
3. Have a barbie full of sausages (not a shrimp in sight unless you’re a real wanker).
4. Drink a few VBs (Victoria Bitter – a delicious lager).
5. Watch fireworks.

Most of Australia wakes up January 27 with a sunburn and a hangover.

We were actually in Oz for Australia Day in 2003. We were on a scuba diving trip and spent the day exploring the Great Barrier Reef. Very Australia, but not very Australian. This year, our co-worker Lucy invited us to her Mum’s farm in the Victoria bush (country) about 2.5 hours from Melbourne. Knowing Lucy is loads of fun and secretly hoping for a “real” Australia Day experience, we accepted.

First thing you notice after arriving at Fay's (Lucy's Mum) the farm is the sculpture in the yard, in the house, on the road, in the trees, etc. Second thing you notice is the animals. She had cows, sheep, chickens, a turkey named ‘gobbles’, a cockatoo, two snakes, 2 sugar gliders (little marsupials like flying squirrels) and three lizards. I’m sure I’m forgetting something.

View of the Valley

Australia Day rose sunny and hot. Lucy, her boyfriend Luke, Sarah (co-worker) and her boyfriend Justin, and we headed down to 90 Mile Beach (Stereotype #1: check). 90-Mile Beach is not an exaggeration. It really is 90 miles long, and from where we accessed all you could see was sand, dunes, and roaring, rolling surf until it faded into a mist in the distance. A beautiful sight. We slapped on the sun cream, spread out our towels, dove in the surf, collected a few shells, and had spent a few hours getting roasted. January seemed a long, long way away.

On the Beach

After the beach it was back to the farm where, lo and behold, a John Williamson CD was playing (stereotype #2: done). You’ll never hear him in the sates, but he’s sort of the voice of rural Australia and sings all about the small towns and country life - sort of like a musical Garrison Keillor. Anyway, once Fay found out we liked his music; it was three days of old JW.

After removing the sand from our bodies, we decided to get out the .22s and take a little target practice. Currently, one of Australia’s famous cricketers (Shane Warne, if that means anything to any of our readers) has his face plastered on the side of a case of VB, and around him there are concentric circles, so it makes an excellent target. We plinked away with the 22s and then Luke got out his high caliber rifle…cannon, really.

When it was Matt’s turn to shoot he forgot he was no longer using a 22. After taking careful aim, he squeezed the trigger – BAM! - and saw stars. The recoil put the scope into his noggin at high velocity and there was blood everywhere. Luckily, 'tis but a flesh wound and a band aid or two staunched the bleeding. Warnie got it in the breastbone on that shot, by the way.

Head Wound

After the excitement, we pulled out the barbie and loaded it up with meat: steaks, hamburgers, and snags (sausages). And we drank a VB or two. (Stereotypes #3 and #4: check and check)

Matt, Marlys, Lucy, Luke, Sarah & Justin

To top the night off, there was a thunderstorm in the valley Fay’s farm overlooks. We could watch the lightning strikes off in the distance and see the clouds flash with color. Quite the light show for the visitors and it qualified as natural fireworks (stereotype #5: check). We had achieved a real, honest to goodness Australia Day.